Since then, we have talked at length about doing something special for our 15th anniversary. As we approached that milestone in our marriage the talk continued, but we couldn't figure out where to go or what to do. We considered several options but nothing felt quite right and to be honest the thought of leaving our boys for the first time freaked me out. Up until this time the only nights I had been away from my boys were as follows: 1 night away from Asher for a brief babymoon before Avery was born...1 night away from Asher when Avery was born...1 night away from Asher and Avery when I had my appendix out. That is it...3 nights total and NEVER had I been away from either of the boys for an entire 24 hour period! Thus the talk of an adult-only vacation was daunting. In the last 2 years almost all of our friends have moved away, we've switched churches, our jobs have at times frustrated, we've missed being close to family, Asher started school, we've wanted to move to a better school district but can't find a house, and basically we've just felt STUCK. This, on top of being two working parents that basically have no free time to spend alone or together, makes for some tough days (which I don't say to host a pity party, but rather to stress how important it was for us to get some time away together), but unfortunately even spending the time to think about what we might do only caused me additional anxiety and stress.
As Christmas approached, Eric began dreaming of sandy beaches, warm sunshine and palm trees...something that happens every year. In the past few years this tropical itch that Eric gets has resulted in us taking a family vacation to Florida, but this year was a little different. On top of wanting to go some place warm, Eric also had the itch to go on another cruise (we've been on 3 in the past but none since before the boys were born). Therefore while I spent my "free" time writing Christmas cards, figuring out what presents to buy, baking cookies and decorating our home, Eric spent his researching cruises and found that there was temporarily a "kids sail free" sale and with that the cruise dream started to become a reality.
For several days we mulled the idea of a family cruise over, but the more I thought of it and the stresses of the past couple of years the more it became apparent to me that this NEEDED to be our 15th anniversary getaway. Eric and I were desperate for some time away together and also time to simply enjoy a lack of responsibility. So despite my anxieties about leaving our little guys for an extended period of time Eric and I did the unthinkable and purchased a cruise vacation for two!!
Once the decision was made and the cruise was paid for there was no turning back (although we did purchase trip insurance and there was a small part of me that hoped we would have to use it so I didn't have to go-wrong, I know). With the plan set in motion there was really nothing more I could do but prepare myself and the kids for the time and get excited. Since the boys have been going to Florida on vacation for as long as they can remember, we didn't want to say anything about what we were doing that would make them jealous, sad or upset. Instead we were very vague about what we were doing and as we worked to get them excited about spending a week with Grammy and Gramps we simply called our getaway Mommy & Daddy's Long Date. They understand the concept of a date and that it is something that Mommy and Daddy do together without them, so by calling it a date they understood that they were not coming along and that we would be gone...somewhere. We also never mentioned the cruise because Asher is very aware of cruise ships (thanks to his Daddy) and would have been very sad that we were taking one without him.
As I thought of our "Date" and agreed to embrace secrecy and avoid giving away details of our getaway to the best of my abilities I realized that the 'mission' as I'd chosen to accept it lends itself to a much cooler name...thus the title of these blog entries: Operation Disguised Adult Tropical Excursion aka Operation D.A.T.E.
We survived the 6 weeks of "need to know basis" with surprising limited pushing for additional information from the boys. Asher eventually did ask us where exactly we were going and we replied with Jamaica (true but not the whole truth...and something that really doesn't mean anything to Asher yet). Then he asked us where we were staying and Eric told him that we would be staying in a very small room with no windows (also true). Finally, he asked us what we would be doing while we were there and I told him that I would be taking LOTS of naps! ;) (true again!). So, we never lied to the boys, but also succeeded in keeping the focus on the exciting and fun-filled time that they would have with Grammy and Gramps rather than focusing on what Eric and I would be doing.
On Friday February 2 we were ready to go. Avery and I spent the morning together hanging out and running some last minute errands. Then as I mentioned in my last post we picked up Asher, had rest time and were greeted by Eric's parents ready to start the week. From that point on, the boys spent the rest of the afternoon playing with Grammy and Gramps in the basement. I had to laugh a little later when I found the coffee already brewing and thought about how exhausting the next week would be for Eric's parents. I also had to laugh (or cry?) when we realized that it looked like Avery had pink eye...figures he would get that right before we leave him for a week.
That night, we all went out to dinner and then said our good nights and goodbyes to the boys. I also got out our baskets of surprises to count down the days for each of them (one gift per day). Then it was off to bed to try and get a little rest before our adventure began.
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